Underemployed

A thrilling(?) conclusion to the ultimate countdown for best sports moments ever. Featuring threatening to kill your peer over minor disputes, punching fans in the stands, an iconic Bronco chase, superkicking an opponent, body slamming an 80-year-old pregnant woman, that time Randy Johnson hit a bird, and oh so much more!

Fresh off being unqualified to talk about rap, David and Jack return to also be unqualified to talk about sports! The definitive list of the best athletic moments ever includes American basketball superiority over the French, fat-shaming men in authority, players calling teammates drunkards, coaches losing their minds, Shaq, a holiday celebrating fighting your neighbors, revealing celebrities you want to boink to a magazine for children, having an ear bitten off, and a surprising amount of Simpsons references.

The rap dorks are back to wrap up their rap bracket. Will "WAP" and "Man's Not Hot" continue their Cinderella runs? Can David's act of friendship carry a song into the next round? How far can a Shaquille O'Neal or John Cena track go in a bracket of this magnitude? Tune in to find out!

As David and Jack eye the finish line of Underemployed, they answer the question the Dependents have been asking them for 7 years: "What's the best rap song of all-time, you dorks?" Well they finally answer it, along with one of the most qualified people to help: Acclaimed rap reviewer Gozie Okoro! Can "WAP" stand tall? Can "Man's Not Hot" pull of one of the greatest upsets ever? Is Shaquille O'Neal a better rapper than A$AP Rocky? Can David pull off one of the greatest troll picks of all-time? Will Jack let John Cena's recent turn to the dark side impact his decisions? Tune in to find out!

It's the final edition of Underemployed's signature episode: The March Madness bracket that features no analysis and instead determines which team's mascot would win in a fight! From tigers and cougars, to kangaroos and big bears doin' thangs, we've got every matchup covered! Plus David and Jack ask the important questions, like how long can a duck fly, and has science gone too far by combining Cajun Jack and Cowboy Jack into one?

It's once again time to reflect and celebrate your 8th favorite podcast, Underemployed! Featuring the best clips of the past year, from David being imprisoned, trees that smell like bodily fluids, mascot fights, working during a global tech outage, and Jack letting go of a 5 1/2-year grudge. Plus they talk about going to a Ravens playoff game, the wedding of a dear friend and former guest, and the insane Luka Doncic-Anthony Davis trade. And they discuss the upcoming end of the podcast, when the last episode will be, and their plans as they near the finish line.

For the seventh and final time, Jack and David bring you the once-a-year extravaganza to cram in your stocking. They hand out their coveted best-of-2024 awards and look at the people and things that shaped the landscape. From the Kendrick Lamar-Drake beef that dominated this year's nominations, to unprecedented political figures, sapphic bops, historic hippos, American Olympic superiority, incriminating yourself while driving with a suspended license, rolling down a hill for cheese, and Shaq. Plus they remember those we lost this year to the great Thugz Mansion in the sky.   Intro sampled from There I Ruined It

After years of hot takes, annoyance, loudness, it's time for one of the most pivotal moments in Underemployed's illustrious history: David Hart's trial. Can he and former guest Joe Dweck prove that he deserves to roam free with normies? Or will Jack prove that David is a danger to society's earholes and patience? Tune in to find out!

The trial of David Hart is still delayed, but Jack refuses to switch up the episode order, so here we are. Destiny's Daddies return to talk about their unintentional summer hiatus, including their travels to Maine, New Orleans, and Seattle; the global tech outage of July that led to chaos at Jack's job and last second flight adjustments, Kendrick Lamar being pegged for the Super Bowl halftime show (while Lil Wayne did not), nearly seeing Goldberg at a Patriots game, Steph Curry being the devil that sunk the French basketball team, and Backyard Baseball coming back. Plus hearing OutKast's Christmas music coming out of a sex store, and Tupac deep cuts playing out of a smoothie store. Also David got a new job and Jack got a new shift!

David is back behind bars after his bond was revoked for general annoyance. But he courageously talks about how it's led to him getting buffer and being rejected by every prison gang. He and Jack also discuss weddings and Emmys they went to, ripped pants, the Celtics are on the mountaintop while the Lakers ship be sinking, Joey Chestnut being removed from the biggest glizzy stage, and the Kendrick Lamar's Pop Out concert. Plus it's officially a #HotBoySummer with music, from Chappell Roan and Billie Eilish to Eminem and... Shaquille O'Neal. And in a bonus clip, Jack pays beautiful tribute to America after we once again beat Canada in the Stanley Cup Finals.

With the trial of his life hanging over his head, David talks about the hard life being accused of felony silliness and shenanigans. They also go track-by-track on the Kendrick Lamar-Drake beef since they last talked about it, have a discussion on the NHL and NBA playoffs, Jack pays tribute to the Lakers for being the true 2023-2024 champions, trying to get Taylor Swift on the show, Jack is firmly pro-nepotism, and Caitlin Clark has ascended to absolute superstardom. Venmo Jack so he can put money in David's commissary.

David and Jack once again give an update on the state of the podcast and the goals they have for the future. Featuring an abundance of Gen Z slang (On God, FR FR) and the phrase "You'd have to imagine", a message about the future of the podcast, and David being locked away in prison on felony silliness charges, but not letting it keep him down.

If you're tired of listening to Taylor Swift's new album, how about some new Underemployed for your earholes? Jack and David return to talk about staring directly at a solar eclipse, the kidney stone-inducing amount of beef going on in the rap world (David actually is enjoying some Drake!), Jontay Porter is a dummy, trees that smell... weird, Jack went to WrestleMania in Philadelphia and got some amazing parking (plus friend of the show Colin Mackey is an amazing host.) Plus David pays tribute to his dear friend OJ Simpson, and Jack's coworkers think he looks like a predator without a beard.

It's once again the March Madness bracket show that proudly boasts absolutely no college basketball analysis whatsoever! Cougars, cocks, hat salesmen, zippers, gatuhs, wolfpacks, and about 12 different teams that feature bulldogs as their mascots; David and Jack dive deep to find out which mascot of the 68 teams in the NCAA Men's D1 tournament would win this bizarre version of the Hunger Games. Also, there's a lot of Cajun Jack (and Cajun David).

Y'all Q'd, we A'd. Despite Jack deleting the original recording a dumb-dumb, he and David are back to answer questions about when they knew they were destined for greatness, purchases if they became billionaires, the new Avatar series, dumb song lyrics, Muppets they'd hang with, Jack's coworker trying to paint him as a misogynist, why David's girlfriend is the best, and much more. Plus Jack wants a "Rasputin"-esque song written about him, David learned what "rizz" means, Jack keeps confusing Panic! at the Disco with Fall Out Boy, baseball is given its flowers, the Nickelodeon broadcast of the Super Bowl being amazing, and Jack has doubts one of their former guests is really injured.

It's that time of year again were Jack and David look back on the year that was, and look forward to the year that be. They talk about their most successful March Madness Mascot bracket ever, Jack getting a new name (and age), the Great Scott's Addition Gas Leak of 2023, David and Jack introducing Bethany to the world of coke rap, driving with your knees to spite the feds, Jack's passionate hatred of Virginia's new porn laws, David naming ladies DMX has boinked, and much more!

It's a new year, but Jack and David are still on their same old nonsense. David talks about the snow in Fredericksburg that led to Bethany having a roughly 6-hour work week, and the wild weather the area's seen this month. Jack talks about the bitter cold in Baltimore while he brought the heat by getting signs on TV at the Ravens game, including one that promoted his own TV station. Plus the potential Eminem-Taylor Swift Super Bowl matchup, David being wrong (and right) about Joe Flacco, the most electric playoff games they've ever been to, a soccer fan in the crowd being called on to ref, and the absolutely abhorrent decision by the FHA to ban funny road signs.

It's time once again for the award show that former President Obama once called "A blight on American freedom", the Undies! In a year dominated by the likes of Taylor Swift and George Santos to a lesser extent, David and Jack tip their cap(s that are hiding their receding hairlines) to a glorious 2023. From victimizing yourself after publishing a video of boinking in a senate hearing room, to Dan Snyder "finally getting his white wedding", the beautiful romance of Michael Jordan's son and Scottie Pippen's ex, and the passion for "Mambo No. 5" that nearly ruined a famous author's relationship. Plus Jack gives a nepotistic nod for Song of the Year, and David pays a heartwarming tribute to his dear friend Henry Kissinger. Intro sampled from: https://youtu.be/nQLJNCDa4GA?si=9JGK4cOpugPsHwwf

Jack and David talk about why they had an extended hiatus (and why they don't have a guest), before getting right back into form with David having beef with the NBA in-season tournament and the notion of Taylor Swift being the biggest musician in the world, Usher at the Super Bowl halftime show, and whether Cajun Jack will be included in Grand Theft Auto VI. Plus the boys saw Clipse in concert, and talk about their experience at the Kennedy Center, along with seeing a pre-teen full embracing the world of coke rap.

Jack and David return to finish up their definitive list of hip-hop's greatest moments. Whether it be the joy brought from "WAP", DMX naming ladies he's boinked in a verse, R. Kelly getting maced, Drake's unintentional child reveal, John Cena becoming a rap legend, Shaq asking Kobe Bryant how his ass tastes, and things getting a little easier out here for a pimp, there's enough moments here to make you want to put back on your 5XL tall tee and get an ice cream tattoo on your face!