Dr Karin Love & Life

You’re engaged! So in love! It’s exhilarating!  Except, when you have cold feet. Are these just wedding jitters? Or, do you need to rethink your decision? As a former runaway bride, this topic hits home to me. Elliott and I decided to kick off our series on premarital counseling by asking a very important first question, “What if you’re engaged, but you’re feeling uncertain and unsure?” In this episode, I share the confusion and angst I experienced when engaged to my first fiancé. Elliott and I discuss the difficulty of sorting through complex cold feet emotions—especially when your fiancé is a wonderful person and you can’t really pinpoint what feels “off.” We provide concrete recommendations for figuring out if your engagement is meant to go the distance, or if calling things off would be the better choice for you and your fiancé.  Join us—whether you’re feeling jittery or not, our conversation highlighting the important elements of engagement will help you build your marriage on a firm foundation! Sp

We wrap up this year with some personal reflections regarding Love & Life’s themes of mind, body, and spirit! Elliott and I discuss some revelations we’ve had via the books and articles we’ve read including: Brain Energy by Christopher Palmer, M.D. Joanna Moncrieff’s challenge of the serotonin theory of depression The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk The work of Dr. Caroline Leaf We share some intentions for aligning our minds, body, and spirit in 2024 and invite you to join us in this journey! Happy New Year from Love & Life! Sponsor The Wellness Company Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠ Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order! Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/ Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson Sources cited in today’s episode: https://www.chrispalmermd.com/ The Serotonin Theory of Depression a Systematic Umbrella Review of the Evidence (https://www.natur

In part 2 of our conversation about family roles, Elliott and I share specific roles we may play when interacting with our family of origin—and others in our lives!  Are you the “family hero?” The black sheep? The lost child?  Join us to determine your role and how to rewrite the script should you feel your role constrains you or proves unhealthy for your adult growth and development. Sponsor The Wellness Company Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠ Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order! Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/ Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/love-and-life-media/message

Whether we’re aware of it or not, we each play various roles within our families. And, even if we’ve grown and changed, we often step right back into our role during family gatherings! Do you know your family role? Do you understand how it impacts you during the holidays and throughout the year? Some of us have a sense of our family role. Maybe you’re the instigator or the peacemaker. The caretaker or the rebel. The leader or the clown. But oftentimes we play a role and we’re not even aware we’re doing so! Join Elliott and me for part 1 of our conversation about family roles. As we identify our roles, we gain deeper understanding of ourselves and our family’s dynamics. Plus, learn how to alter your role if you’ve grown out of it and it doesn’t fit you anymore! Sponsor The Wellness Company Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠ Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order! Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/ Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook

Elliott and I continue our series on how to best engage with family members over the holidays with this episode devoted to family rules. All families have a “code of conduct.” Some of these expectations are well known by all members. Others operate just beneath the surface.  How do we manage family rules now that we’re adults? How do we navigate the expectations of our family and then adjust to those of our spouse’s family—especially when these rules are so very different? And furthermore, what if our family’s rules violate the values we now hold as adults? Can we interact with respect for our loved ones while maintaining our integrity and authenticity? Join us to learn how to identify your family of origin’s covert rules to ascertain how they may be impacting you and your relationships.  You CAN remain true to your values and ethics while simultaneously enjoying your family this holiday season!   Sponsor The Wellness Company Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠ Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your ord

With the new year right around the corner, you may be thinking about resolutions. Many of us want to level up our health and fitness, but oftentimes we feel daunted because we’ve tried a hundred times before, yet never reached our goals. Help is here! Justin Savich, creator of The Pure Fat Loss Challenge, brings over 20 years of nutrition, strength training, and fitness knowledge to his proven program which has helped thousands of people lose fat–not muscle! Join us for Justin’s expertise about food, exercise, and weight. His inside info helps us sort out fact from fiction in the health and wellness domain–a space that so often feels incredibly confusing with contradictory messages from various factions and agendas. Plus, you’ll have the opportunity to kick off 2024 by participating in Justin’s Pure Fat Loss Challenge beginning on December 27th! Sponsor The Wellness Company Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠ Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order! Justin Savich The Pure Fat Loss Challenge: https:/

Triangulation. It’s so easy. We all do it. But, it’s SO unhealthy.  What’s triangulation? Here’s a common example: We get angry, but instead of talking to the person who upset us, we gripe about it with someone else. We loop in a third party. It diffuses the tension, but does it move us toward solving the dispute/problem?  Not at all. As we continue our series on how to connect with our families in a healthy manner throughout the holidays—and always!—Elliott and I discuss the perils of triangulated relationships in families. We provide examples of triangulation and explain the myriad ways it negatively impacts relationships. We leave you with three takeaways for figuring out if you’re involved in a family triangle and more importantly, how to extricate yourself if (when!) you realize you’re in the midst of one. Sponsor The Wellness Company Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠ Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order! Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/ Emp

Last week we talked about the importance of maintaining boundaries with our family during holiday gatherings. But what if boundaries aren’t enough? What if we simply can’t get along with our family? We no longer agree on anything and we can’t find common ground. Should we completely cut them off? Or, is there a better way? Today, Elliott and I discuss the Family Systems construct of Individuation and explain why it’s an incredibly important process to move through in young adulthood—whether you’re single or married. We provide concrete steps for healthy individuating and explain how your levels of closeness and separateness to your family of origin directly impact every other relationship in your life—even in adulthood! We leave you with 3 takeaways to help you interact with your family authentically, maturely, and in an individuated manner throughout the holidays. Sponsor The Wellness Company Website: ⁠https://www.twc.health/lovelife⁠ Code: LOVELIFE for 15% off your order! Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott

Holiday family gatherings should bring us closer, but sometimes they do the exact opposite! All too often, we get together only to grow apart. Help is here! Implementing principles from Family Systems Therapy allows us to cultivate true intimacy while reducing family drama. In today’s episode, Elliott and I delve into boundaries. We share concrete strategies for establishing boundaries with family members—even those who pry into your business with questions like: “Are you seeing anyone special?” “When are two going to make me a grandma?” “You’re not voting for _____________ next year, are you???” We provide examples of how to: respond to invasive interrogation you don’t care to address.  remain committed to your values and principles without alienating family members whose beliefs differ from yours. mindfully move through difficult conversations.  Join us for a timely conversation designed to prepare you for upcoming family gatherings. Spoiler alert: you CAN maintain boundaries while growing cl

The holidays are upon us and in efforts to make the season as bright as possible, Elliott and I want to share principles from one of our favorite therapeutic orientations—Family Systems Theory and Therapy. And yes, siblings can get under our skin in ways no one else can. And sure, in-law interactions may be strained. And of course, blended families present us with unique challenges, but still—we CAN remain joyful at parties and gatherings and we CAN minimize the drama by keeping 3 key principles in mind. Join us for this first episode in our series on how to dial down family drama this holiday season! Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/ Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/love-and-life-media/message

In fact, we’re taught to avoid talking about finances because it’s considered a bit gauche—especially when you don’t know someone very well. Furthermore, what if you’re not all that proud of your relationship with money? Maybe your bank account refuses to grow and “retail therapy” is your go-to coping mechanism! Or, it seems you just can’t get ahead no matter how much you save! Emily Burnett can relate. She’s a self-proclaimed “money mess” and “budget loather” who was thousands of dollars in debt. But then, she dramatically changed her relationship with money and found freedom in fiscal responsibility!  She shares her journey in her new book, Dear Fellow Spender:  Enjoy Using Your Money to Get Out of Debt, Build Savings, and Create a Life You Love.  And no, we don’t need to have our finances completely sorted out in order to have healthy partnerships, but we do need to have an understanding of our relationship with money—because, research shows it’s a factor that greatly influences marriages. Elliott and

I asked Elliott the other day, “We’ve been talking about cheating and recovery, but what can we do to try to prevent affairs from happening in the first place?” And yes, healing is possible and, as Elliott continues to stress, we may even find deeper intimacy after infidelity. But of course, wouldn’t we prefer to grow closer to our spouse without going through a marital breakdown? In this conversation, we present 3 strategies for keeping your marriage solid and connected! We can’t control our partner, but we CAN take steps ourselves to strengthen our bond and increase the likelihood of remaining faithful to each other. Elliott and I share examples of what we do personally to keep the fire burning (REO reference for our fellow GenXers

After posting episodes 265 and 266, Karin and I continue to see a need to continue the discussion about cheating. So today we continue our cheating series by responding additional concerns and discuss how to start the healing process. Specifically, we address: What's the first step in the healing process? How to navigate forgiveness and grief What to do if children are involved What rebuilding trust looks like after betrayal Join us for this third segment in our series on cheating. And please, let us know if you have any questions! Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/ Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/love-and-life-media/message

After posting episode 265, Elliott and I received additional questions about infidelity, so we wanted to continue our cheating series by responding to these concerns. Specifically, we address: What exactly is cheating? Is flirting too much a violation? What about porn? Connecting with an old flame on Facebook? Close friendships with coworkers? What are the first steps to take if one of us has broken our vows? Can we ever rebuild trust? What if the betrayer won’t acknowledge the indiscretion? How can we ever forgive? When is separation necessary? What can we do when we’re single to prepare ourselves for a strong marriage—one in which neither partner is likely to stray? Spoiler alert: there’s actually a LOT we can do when we’re single to set ourselves up for an affair-proof future marriage! Join us for this second segment in our series on cheating. And please, let us know if you have any questions! Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/ Empowered

Just Wear the Mask.  It’s Not a Big Deal! Or, is It? A Developmental Psychologist’s Concerns Regarding Masks on Children—and All of Us! We’re bringing you another segment of our “Love & Life:  Let’s Talk About It” series.  These are topics that can be hard to broach and in some cases, conversations around these issues have been censored—either by social media platforms, or by social agreement—because,”Let’s not talk about it. We’ll just get into a fight.”  But avoiding subjects to preserve harmony doesn’t foster true intimacy—and because Elliott and I are all about deep, meaningful, intimate relationships, we’re going to speak honestly about those issues which are most important to us.  Today’s “Love and Life:  Let’s Talk About It!” topic? Masks. Over the past several years of the pandemic, masks have become an insanely contentious topic. The debate has waged for 3, almost 4 years now, so I’m sure you have your opinion and I’m not trying to change anyone’s mind.  I just want to bring up some relevan

No one walks down the aisle on their wedding day expecting to cheat on their spouse. But sadly, it happens all too often.  What happens? Why do couples stray? Elliott and I discuss 4 types of affairs (Pittman) and 3 reasons why they happen (Balswick & Balswick).  Join us for part 1 in our series on infidelity. Learn how to protect your marriage from an affair and/or recover from the pain if infidelity has already occurred.  Citation: https://hackspirit.com/infidelity-statistics/ Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/ Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/love-and-life-media/message

We’ve all heard it a million times—you are what you eat. And, of course it’s true—every cell in our body relies on and is sustained by the nutrients we ingest. So on a physical level, this reality is obvious.  But, the more research I do, the more I realize how much this adage—you are what you eat—pertains to our mental health as well.  In some ways, I think about all the work I’ve done as a psychologist—as many of you know, I’ve found so much power in cognitive techniques. When we take charge of our thoughts, we take charge of our lives—and, I absolutely stand by cognitive strategies. More importantly though, research substantiates the effectiveness of CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy), as we’ve discussed in many episodes of Love & Life.  That being said, how much easier is it for us to take charge of our thoughts if we’re fueling our bodies in a way that supports our thinking and emotions? That’s why Elliott and I focus on MIND and BODY and SPIRIT. Today’s episode is part 2 of my conversation with Dr.

About a year ago, I started hearing a term that was new to me—seed oils. Apparently, they’re everywhere—in virtually all processed foods. And, recent research links them to horrible health outcomes. So, I did a lot of reading and found that much of what I’d understood about dietary fats was completely off base. For years, I’d been making food choices I thought were healthy but in fact, they were the exact opposite of nutritious! One book that deeply impacted me—and Dan, too, because I immediately started cooking with different ingredients—was The FatBurn Fix by Dr. Cate Shanahan. I reached out to her to see if she’d be willing to appear on the program. Today, Dr. Shanahan joins us to unpack the deleterious effects of industrial seed oils—along with the remarkable benefits of eliminating them from our diets! Stay tuned for Part 2, which releases next week! Dr. Cate Shanahan Website: http://drcate.com/ Books: https://drcate.com/books/  Instagram: @drcateshanahan Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Webs

We’re in the midst of a mental health war. Over the last 50 years, we’ve raised awareness and developed abundant treatment options, yet Americans’ rates of depression and anxiety continue to skyrocket (Whitaker, 2015). Today, Elliott and I discuss my reflections on his recent messages about the epidemics of anxiety, depression, loneliness, and addiction. We conceptualize the current mental health landscape as a war for two reasons:  (1) because so many Americans battle psychological concerns and (2) professionals are in the midst of deeply contentious disputes regarding how to best treat clients’ emotional distress. Pharmaceutical corporations and many psychiatrists view this issue through a medical model i.e. patients are diagnosed with psychiatric illnesses and are prescribed pills to manage symptoms. But despite an exponential increase in the use of psychotropic medications, the number of Americans filing disability claims due to mental conditions has tripled over the last two decades (Whitaker, 2015).

Elliott’s mental health series continues with a message about addiction. Sadly, addictions have touched us all—whether we’ve struggled ourselves or we’ve endured the pain of watching a loved one wrestle with the grip of addiction. Elliott shares an understanding of addiction through a Biblical lens. He tackles questions surrounding the grip of addiction and the hope and healing we can find in Christ. Download Elliott’s PowerPoint here: https://www.dropbox.com/scl/fi/6pku0usfyr8cz8enz2dyi/Altering-Addictions.pptx?rlkey=t1p3y55dyo1gjhdvzzs4q82l1&dl=0 Dr. Karin & Pastor Elliott Anderson Website: http://loveandlifemedia.com/ Empowered Dating Playbook: smarturl.it/EmpoweredDatingBook Instagram: @dr.karin | @pastorelliottanderson --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/love-and-life-media/message